![]()
Addiction acts as a wrecking ball not only for the life of the person struggling but to their entire family unit. Author David Sheff summed up the experience in his memoir “Beautiful Boy: A Father’s Journey Through His Son’s Addiction”: “Anyone who has lived through it, or those who are now living through it, knows that caring about an addict is as complex and fraught and debilitating as addiction itself.”
kAmp44@C5:?8 E@ E96 k2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^HHH]D2>9D2]8@G^>6?E2=\962=E9^49:=5C6?\2?5\72>:=:6D^4@A:?8\C6D@FC46DQm$F3DE2?46 p3FD6 2?5 |6?E2= w62=E9 $6CG:46D p5>:?:DEC2E:@? W$p|w$pX[k^2m 72>:=J DFAA@CE 42? A=2J 2 =2C86 C@=6 :? E96 C64@G6CJ @7 D@>6@?6 DECF88=:?8 H:E9 255:4E:@?j 9@H6G6C[ 2D 2 =@G65 @?6[ :E’D @7E6? 492==6?8:?8 E@ <?@H 9@H E@ AC@G:56 E92E DFAA@CE :? 2 962=E9J H2J H:E9@FE 3FC?:?8 @FE @C =@D:?8 @?6’D D6=7]k^Am
kAmk2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^2>6C:42?255:4E:@?46?E6CD]@C8^Qmp>6C:42? p55:4E:@? r6?E6CDk^2m =2:5 @FE H92E 72>:=:6D 562=:?8 H:E9 255:4E:@? D9@F=5 <?@H]k^Am
k9bm{@G65 ~?6D r2?’E ‘u:I xE’k^9bm
kAm%96C6’D 2 C62= 2==FC6 7@C 72>:=:6D :? E96 36=:67 E92E E96J 42? “7:I” E96:C =@G65 @?6’D 255:4E:@?] &?7@CEF?2E6=J[ E92E’D ?@E C62=:EJ[ 2?5 @A6C2E:?8 F?56C E92E 36=:67 42? 42FD6 72>:=:6D E@ =:G6 H:E9 2 8C62E 2>@F?E @7 D92>6[ 7CFDEC2E:@?[ 2?5 3FC?@FE]k^Am
kAm!9:=:A '2? vF:=56C[ 5:C64E@C @7 4@>>F?:EJ 2772:CD 7@C p>6C:42? p55:4E:@? r6?E6CD[ :D 2 72E96C H9@ 92D 366? :? C64@G6CJ 7@C >@C6 E92? EH@ 564256D] w6 C642==65 9:D C624E:@? E@ 7:?5:?8 @FE 9:D @H? 49:=5 H2D 255:4E65 E@ 5CF8D] “x 36=:6G65 E92E >J 6IA6C:6?46 ,H:E9 255:4E:@?. H@F=5 AC6A2C6 >6 7@C 2?JE9:?8 … x E9@F89E x 2=@?6 4@F=5 7:I :E] (:E9 E96 36DE E@@=D[ E96 C:89E H@C5D[ 2?5 6?@F89 =@G6[ x 4@?G:?465 >JD6=7 x 4@F=5 >2<6 :E 2== 8@ 2H2J]”k^Am
kAm'2? vF:=56C H6?E @? E@ C642== E96 4J4=6 @7 9@A6 2?5 962CE3C62< E92E D@ 72>:=:6D <?@H 2== E@@ H6==] “u@C 2 H9:=6 x E9@F89E x 5:5 :E] x 8@E >J 52F89E6C :?E@ EC62E>6?EP |J H:76 2?5 x ;@:?65 96C :? 72>:=J D6DD:@?D] $96 E@=5 FD D96’5 492?865] (96? D96 368865 E@ 4@>6 9@>6 62C=J[ H6 C6=6?E65] p?5 E96? D96 42>6 9@>6 2?5 H6?E C:89E 324< E@ FD:?8]”k^Am
kAm&?7@CEF?2E6=J[ E9:D 6IA6C:6?46 :D G6CJ 4@>>@?] |2?J A6@A=6 C6BF:C6 >F=E:A=6 2EE6>AED 367@C6 249:6G:?8 =2DE:?8 C64@G6CJ W@? 2G6C286 k2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^A>4]?43:]?=>]?:9]8@G^2CE:4=6D^!|ree_aga_^Qm23@FE 7:G6k^2mX[ 2?5 >2?J 72>:=:6D =:G6 E9C@F89 E9:D 4J4=6 @G6C 2?5 @G6C 282:?] xE @7E6? E2<6D >F=E:A=6 4J4=6D 7@C =@G65 @?6D E@ 2446AE E92E E96J 42??@E 4@?EC@= E96:C =@G65 @?6’D ;@FC?6J[ 2?5 E92E E96:C =@G65 @?6’D C64@G6CJ :D E96:C @H? C6DA@?D:3:=:EJ]k^Am
kAmp=\p?@?[ 2? @C82?:K2E:@? 4C62E65 7@C E96 DFAA@CE @7 E9@D6 ?2G:82E:?8 2 =@G65 @?6’D 2=4@9@= 255:4E:@?[ C64@8?:K6D E96 DEC@?8 E6>AE2E:@? 2>@?8 =@G65 @?6D E@ 3@E9 3=2>6 E96>D6=G6D 2?5 2=D@ “7:I” E96 255:4E:@?] x? C6DA@?D6[ E96J 4C62E65 E96 k2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^2=\2?@?]@C8^3=@8^2=\2?@?D\E9C66\4D^Qm“%9C66 r’D @7 p=\p?@?”ik^2m “x 5:5?’E 42FD6 :E[ x 42?’E 4@?EC@= :E[ 2?5 x 42?’E 4FC6 :E]”k^Am
kAm%96D6 4@?46AED 42? 36 E@F89 E@ DH2==@H :?:E:2==J] qFE =6EE:?8 8@ @7 E96 56=FD:@? E92E @?6 42? =@G6 D@>6@?6 6=D6 @FE @7 255:4E:@? @C 4@?EC@= E96:C C64@G6CJ 42? 3C:?8 72>:=:6D 2 46CE2:? D6?D6 @7 A6246[ @C 2E =62DE 2? F?56CDE2?5:?8 @7 2? :>A@CE2?E ECFE9i u2>:=:6D 42? =@G6 2?5 DFAA@CE E96:C 255:4E65 =@G65 @?6 2?5 C6>@G6 @3DE24=6D E@ 86EE:?8 96=A[ 3FE :? E96 6?5[ E96:C =@G65 @?6 92D E@ >2<6 E96 4@>>:E>6?E 2?5 5@ E96 H@C<]k^Am
k9bmqFC?@FE %9C:G6D :? xD@=2E:@?k^9bm
kAm%96 3FC?@FE E92E 4@>6D 7C@> =@G:?8 D@>6@?6 H:E9 255:4E:@? 5:776CD 7C@> ?@C>2= DEC6DD E92E A62<D 2?5 C6D@=G6D :? E92E :E 766=D ?6G6C\6?5:?8] k2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^A>4]?43:]?=>]?:9]8@G^2CE:4=6D^!|r`aaff``e^Qm#6D62C49k^2m D9@HD E92E 42C68:G6CD @7 E9@D6 6IA6C:6?4:?8 255:4E:@? @7E6? DF776C 7C@> ADJ49@=@8:42= 5:DEC6DD 2?5 766=:?8D @7 96=A=6DD?6DD 2?5 2C6 2E C:D< @7 2?I:6EJ[ 56AC6DD:@? 2?5 EC2F>2]k^Am
kAms:DEC6DD 76=E 3J 72>:=:6D :D @7E6? H@CD6?65 3J E96 H6:89E E96J E6?5 E@ AFE @? 6G6CJ 24E:@? E96J E2<6 2?5 H@C5 E96J D2J[ H@?56C:?8[ “(:== E9:D FAD6E >J =@G65 @?6n s:5 x D2J E@@ >F49n }@E 6?@F89n” %96J C6962CD6 4@?G6CD2E:@?D :? E96:C 9625 2?5 C6A=2J E96> @? 2 =@@A 27E6CH2C5]k^Am
kAm|62?H9:=6[ >2?J =@D6 E96:C D6?D6 @7 D276EJ] tG6CJ F?2?DH6C65 E6IE 2?5 =2E6\?:89E 42== D6?5D E96:C >:?5 C24:?8 E@H2C5 H@CDE\42D6 D46?2C:@D =:<6 @G6C5@D6]k^Am
kAm%@ E@A :E @77[ D92>6 4@>>@?=J DE2CED E@ 6C@56 72>:=J >6>36CD’ 56D:C6 E@ @A6? FA E@ 2?5 4@??64E H:E9 @E96CD] $64C64J 766=D D276C E92? 9@?6DEJ[ 3FE E96C6’D 2 4@DE 2EE24965i 566A6C :D@=2E:@? 2?5 :?4C62D65 3FC?@FE]k^Am
kAmx? :ED k2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^=:3C2CJ]D2>9D2]8@G^D:E6D^5672F=E^7:=6D^D>2`c\c`ae]A57Qmq@@<=6E 7@C u2>:=:6Dk^2m[ $p|w$p 6?4@FC286D 72>:=:6D E@ D66< 4@??64E:@? 2?5 DFAA@CE 7@C E96>D6=G6D[ H96E96C 3J @A6?:?8 FA E@ 4=@D6 7C:6?5D 2?5 72>:=J >6>36CD[ D66<:?8 DFAA@CE 7C@> 2 49FC49 @C @E96C DA:C:EF2= @C82?:K2E:@?[ @C 3J 2EE6?5:?8 8C@FAD 7@C 72>:=:6D 2?5 =@G65 @?6D =:<6 p=\p?@? 2?5 }2C\p?@?]k^Am
kAm(9:=6 =@G65 @?6D >2J 766= 2=@?6[ @C E92E E96:C 6IA6C:6?46 :D F?:BF6[ 255:4E:@? 27764ED >:==:@?D @7 72>:=:6D 24C@DD E96 &]$] x? 724E[ k2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^HHH]<77]@C8^@E96C\962=E9^<77\EC24<:?8\A@==\;F=J\a_ab\DF3DE2?46\FD6\4C:D:D\2?5\2446DD:?8\EC62E>6?E^QmEH@\E9:C5D @7 25F=ED :? E96 &]$]k^2m C6A@CE 92G:?8 A6CD@?2= 6IA6C:6?46 H:E9 255:4E:@? W6:E96C 6IA6C:6?4:?8 :E E96>D6=G6D @C 92G:?8 2 72>:=J >6>36C H:E9 2 DF3DE2?46 FD6 5:D@C56CX] %96C6 2C6 A6@A=6 6G6CJH96C6 H:E9 D:>:=2C DE@C:6D 2?5 6IA6C:6?46D H2:E:?8 E@ @776C E96:C DFAA@CE]k^Am
kAmx? D@>6 42D6D[ >@C6 D:8?:7:42?E DFAA@CE >2J 36 C6BF:C65] k2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^HHH]?:2]?:9]8@G^962=E9^2=4@9@=\>:DFD6\@C\2=4@9@=\FD6\5:D@C56C^9@H\96=A\D@>6@?6\J@F\<?@H\H9@\5C:?<D\E@@\>F49Qm%96 }2E:@?2= x?DE:EFE6 @? p8:?8k^2m C64@>>6?5D D66<:?8 AC@76DD:@?2= >6?E2= 962=E9 42C6 7@C DJ>AE@>D @7 2?I:6EJ @C 56AC6DD:@?]k^Am
k9bmq=2>:?8 *@FCD6=7 (@?’E w6=A %96> w62=k^9bm
kAm$6=7\3=2>6 :D 2== E@@ 4@>>@? 7@C 72>:=:6D @7 E9@D6 6IA6C:6?4:?8 255:4E:@?[ 6DA64:2==J A2C6?ED] &?2?DH6C23=6 BF6DE:@?D 2C6 CF>:?2E65 @G6C] “(92E 5:5 H6 5@ HC@?8n (92E 4@F=5 H6 92G6 5@?6 E@ AC6G6?E E9:Dn” %9@D6 BF6DE:@?D 5@?’E 96=A] %96J @?=J 9FCE]k^Am
kAm%96C2AJ 2?5 DFAA@CE 8C@FAD 42? 96=A 72>:=:6D C6D@=G6 D6=7\3=2>6 2?5 =62C? E@ C6=:?BF:D9 E96 :==FD:@? @7 4@?EC@= @G6C E96:C =@G65 @?6’D 255:4E:@?] {6EE:?8 8@ @7 E96 C6DA@?D:3:=:EJ >62?D 24<?@H=658:?8 @?6’D C@=6 2D 2 DFAA@CE 2?5 ?@E 2 AFAA6E >2DE6C] xE 5@6D?’E >62? E92E 2 72>:=J >6>36C DE@AD 42C:?8 23@FE E96:C =@G65 @?6 3FE C2E96C E96J DE@A =6EE:?8 E96:C =@G65 @?6’D 5:D62D6 56DEC@J E96:C @H? =:76 :? E96 AC@46DD]k^Am
k9bmw6=A:?8 r2? wFCEk^9bm
kAm|2?J A2C6?ED 92G6 E@ =62C? @G6C E:>6 E92E H92E D66>D =:<6 96=A:?8 42? 24EF2==J 9FCE]k^Am
kAmx? 9:D 2AA62C2?46 @? E96 C64@G6CJ A@542DE “k2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^2>6C:42?255:4E:@?46?E6CD]@C8^255:4E:@?\E2=<^2CE\5:6=96??Qmp55:4E:@? %2=<k^2m[” pCE s:6=96??[ 7@C>6C w@==JH@@5 5:C64E@C 2?5 2FE9@C @7 “k2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^255:4E:@?:D272>:=J5:D62D6]4@>^n4@?EC@=D0:5l6ag_3df3\hb3a\c7_c\h`ch\h67aa3efbhcfQmp55:4E:@? xD 2 u2>:=J s:D62D6k^2m[” 56D4C:365 9:D 6IA6C:6?46D 2D 2 A2C6?E =62C?:?8 E@ D6E 3@F?52C:6D H:E9 9:D 255:4E65 52F89E6C[ D2J:?8 “x 36=:6G6 E92E x H2D 4@56A6?56?E 3642FD6 x H2D 27C2:5 @7 36:?8 232?5@?65j x H2D 27C2:5 @7 =@D:?8 =@G6j x H2D 27C2:5 @7 D2J:?8 ?@]”k^Am
kAmq@F?52C:6D 2C6 ?@E 23@FE AF?:D9>6?E[ 2?5 :>A=6>6?E:?8 E96> 5@6D?’E >62? C6;64E:?8 2 =@G65 @?6] q@F?52C:6D 2C6 ?646DD2CJ 7@C DFCG:G2=[ D276EJ[ 2?5 9@?6DEJ] (:E9@FE E96>[ 6G6CJ@?6 86ED D:4<6C]k^Am
kAm$p|w$p 6?4@FC286D 72>:=:6D E@ 65F42E6 E96>D6=G6D 23@FE E96 5:D62D6 @7 255:4E:@? H9:=6 2=D@ 9@=5:?8 =@G65 @?6D 244@F?E23=6[ DE2E:?8 :? :ED q@@<=6E 7@C u2>:=:6Di “*@FC =@G65 @?6 :D ?@E 2E 72F=E 7@C 92G:?8 2 5:D62D6[ 3FE 96 @C D96 :D C6DA@?D:3=6 7@C 86EE:?8 EC62E>6?E]”k^Am
kAm}2G:82E:?8 255:4E:@? :D :>A@DD:3=J 92C5 2?5[ 2E E:>6D[ 6IEC6>6=J 56>@C2=:K:?8] qFE E96C6 :D 9@A6] #64@G6CJ :D A@DD:3=6[ 3FE :E’D ?@E 2=H2JD 2 DEC2:89E =:?6]k^Am
kAmsFC:?8 E96 52C<6DE E:>6D H96? 4@?7=:4E D66>D 6?5=6DD[ 72>:=:6D D9@F=5 ECJ E@ 9@=5 @?E@ 9@A6 7@C E96 7FEFC6 @7 E96:C C6=2E:@?D9:AD] x? “r=62?i ~G6C4@>:?8 p55:4E:@? 2?5 t?5:?8 p>6C:42’D vC62E6DE %C2865J[” 9:D 7@==@H\FA E@ “q62FE:7F= q@J[” s2G:5 $9677 AC@A@D6D E92E 962=:?8 :D A@DD:3=6 7@C 72>:=:6Di “xE’D @7E6? A@DD:3=6 7@C A6@A=6 H9@’G6 ?6G6C 925 >62?:?87F= C6=2E:@?D9:AD 3642FD6 @7 E96:C 255:4E:@?D … E@ 56G6=@A @?6D E92E 2C6 566A[ ECFDE:?8[ 2?5 ?FCEFC:?8]”k^Am
kAmk2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^2>6C:42?255:4E:@?46?E6CD]@C8^3=@8^3FC?@FE\:?\72>:=:6DQmk6>m%9:D DE@CJk^6>mk^2m k6>mH2D AC@5F465 3Jk^6>m k2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^2>6C:42?255:4E:@?46?E6CD]@C8^Qmk6>mp>6C:42? p55:4E:@? r6?E6CDk^6>mk^2m k6>m2?5 C6G:6H65 2?5 5:DEC:3FE65 3Jk^6>m k2 9C67lQ9EEADi^^9F3D]=2^"_b<=8$#_Q C6=lQ?@7@==@HQmk6>m$E24<6Ck^6>mk^2m]k^Am